Rationalizing the Irrational!

Thursday, March 3, 2011

Stoke the fire


In 1997 I was a club professional working club jobs and teaching here in Winnipeg. Back then I had a little fire in my belly...I thought I could one day just play golf for a living. It's not very easy I can assure you! I was fortunate enough to have played some golf with a member at one of those clubs who felt I was good enough to do it. He sponsored me to play the Western States Tour (Southern California). The sponsorship was really loose, no contracts and thinking back on it, on my part....not very well thought out! Anyway, I went out to California with enough money to enter 3 events. My idea was to try and make some money in those events and see how far I could "let it ride"!! I had no accommodations, I slept in my car (usually at the course the night before the event or in a Walmart parking lot on the stretches between events) I would wake up to my watch alarm and use the courses locker room to shower and get ready on tournament days. I had no practice facilities, I would stop and try to use practice greens at some of the clubs I saw along the way...usually someone from the facility would ask me to leave, but once I explained who I was and what I was doing they would offer me a sorry look and tell me I could stay! I couldn't even afford to buy driving range balls. I had next to no money for food either, I lived off of Fruit Loops and peanut butter sandwiches. I ended up playing those 3 events and did.....in a word - awful. I was 100% not prepared for how good the competition would be and just how bad a tole my meager living conditions would take on my game. I do have one neat story though. I was playing a practice round at the Temecula CC in preparation for my last event and I was paired up with two older gentlemen from Michigan (I think...northern States anyways - they were on a 2 week golf getaway) They thought I had some game but that I looked pretty shabby and sad, they offered to let me crash on their hotel floor for the night before the event, I felt like I had won a lottery! (looking back now I would never do that I didn't even know those guys a couple of hours ago, who knows what they could do to you when you sleep) I played that event and did as expected...I headed back north with only a credit card for gas that same afternoon! I don't recall eating at all the on trip home. It was a tough ride home, I felt ashamed, and like I had failed on a monumental scale. I returned to my club job and life went on.


Two years down the road Jackie was working in a place called Greenwood, South Carolina as a travel nurse for the winter. We were still newly weds. I still had this dream of playing for a living but I also still held onto the scars from my last attempt at mini-tour golf. I was lucky enough in Greenwood to befriend a fellow who was an assistant professional at the private club in town (The Greenwood Cluuuuub) He got me in the door of some facilities and I was able to pick up a couple competitive games a week. I was also teaching on the side at a beautiful place called Stoney Point Golf Course. For what ever reason they liked me and would let me play as much as I wanted! I was hitting balls one day on this little dusty driving range down the road from our apartment. I was all alone and it was a beautiful sunny day. (I usually practiced away from Stoney Point...as I would always get distracted by members at the club looking for help on their games). To this day I don't know why I did this but, I tried to grip the club with my left hand a little different...I could not believe how much better I hit the ball. It went far and straight ALL THE TIME! I remember picking Jackie up from the hospital she worked at and how excited I was to tell her about it. I found new life. I was shooting rounds at par or better in our weekly games. The members would make me play the farthest tees when I played in the games and still I'd kick some southern butts! As fate would have it Jackie's term job was running out and we really weren't fond of  "the South". We decided to take a term position in Phoenix AZ. I thought I would go and continue with improving the game and possibly giving the mini-tour thing another rip. But, when we got to Phoenix, games were not easy to come by. I was now just a very, very, very small fish in a huge tank full of golf pros and wannabes. I found it next to impossible to find a place that would allow me to practice in return for services...everyone was concerned that I was an "illegal alien". Paying for play was WAY out of the question, we simply could not afford it and I was wise enough not to push the idea. My game tapered off a little due to the reduced practice/play schedule. Also, we were not enjoying the hustle and bustle of Phoenix. I had a phone call one day from a pro in Winnipeg to go to work with him at a very nice private club back home. (we figured if he tracked me down in AZ he must really want me!) We were also looking at starting a family and we both agreed Winnipeg was the right place to do that. That is when in my opinion my true competitive golf game ended. Sure, I'd play pro tournaments around Winnipeg but it was not the same ritualized practice and play schedule I had in South Carolina.

There of course is way more to the story than that, but I truly believe that taking that private club job was the down fall of what I had worked so hard to accomplish that winter. The flip side was that I ended up working at a fantastic facility, however we were so understaffed I would work long hours in the shop week in and week out that I just wanted to go home at the end of the day. I could not motivate myself to stay and practice. Of course no practice = crappy golf!

FAST FORWARD to today:

I have the flu, I'm sick at home from a job I really enjoy. I'm in close to the best shape I've ever been in my entire life. The golf "bug" is starting to grow in me again. I have the Golf Channel on for noise as I'm making some tea. There is a segment on Jack Nicklaus (Playing Lessons from the Pros) He's talking about how he grips the golf club....he said exactly what I did on the dusty driving range 12 years ago. I stopped in my tracks, my chin hit the floor. I sat down stunned to listen more....then the channel reception went dead.  I have never studied Nicklaus at all, I have always been a fan of Seve and Payne Stuart....I could not believe my ears. Did I find some secret to golf all on my own that one day...then let it slip away? Only time will tell as I slowly rekindle the competitive golf fire over the next few years. I feel like life has guided me to this perfect position which will accommodate a return to serious competitive golf 4 or 5 years down the road. Look out Senior Tour!

I always believe there is a reason for everything that happens...but this one was down right spooky.

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